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Physical effort: Low Lateral

The Dance of the Crossed Bodies: relaxed oral sex lying side by side

The Dance of the Crossed Bodies is a relaxed oral sex position. He lies flat on his back with his legs straight, and she lies on her side next to him, parallel to his body but shifted down so that her head reaches his pelvis. Her chest and one arm rest on his abdomen. There is no penetration: she sets the pace with her mouth and hand while he rests completely. It takes very little effort from either partner.

Also known as: Soldier · Side-lying oral sex · Lying-down blowjob

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Illustration of The Dance of the Crossed Bodies: Oral sex lying down: he lies flat on his back and she lies on her side next to him, her head at the level of his pelvis and her chest resting on his abdomen.
Anatomy and biomechanics

The receiving partner lies flat on his back, legs straight and together, arms relaxed at his sides and head on the mattress. The giving partner lies on her side alongside him, facing the same direction as his body but lower down, so that her head rests at the level of his pelvis. Her chest and one arm rest on his abdomen, her knees are slightly bent and her legs lie next to his. From there she uses her mouth, and her free hand if she wishes, and controls the rhythm and depth. Neither has to hold weight: he rests on his back and she on her side. There is no eye contact or kissing, but body contact is broad, from her chest to her legs.

Why this position works

It is one of the most restful ways to give and receive oral sex: no kneeling, no bending over, and both bodies lie on the bed. He can let go completely, and she decides the pace and depth, which many people find reassuring. Her chest and arm on his abdomen keep plenty of skin-to-skin contact. Because it is so undemanding, it can last a long time or be a gentle start before something else. How much each person enjoys it varies.

Sensory Exploration Relaxation and Surrender Easy Non-Penetrative Interaction

Variations of this position

Variation 1: with a pillow under her head

A pillow under her head or shoulder raises it to the right height, so her neck stays straight and she can continue for longer.

The position is the same, but the giving partner rests her head and shoulder on a pillow placed next to his hip. Her head is slightly higher and her neck no longer has to bend or hold the weight of the head, which reduces strain. Her chest rests a little less on his abdomen.

  1. He lies flat on his back with his legs straight.
  2. Place a pillow on the bed next to his hip.
  3. She lies on her side with her head and shoulder on the pillow, facing his pelvis.
  4. She adjusts the height of the pillow until her neck is straight.

Variation 2: he bends his knees and opens his legs slightly

He bends his knees with his feet flat on the bed and opens his legs a little, leaving more room for her mouth and hand.

Instead of keeping his legs straight and together, the receiving partner bends his knees, puts his feet flat on the mattress and lets his legs open slightly. His pelvis tilts a little and the testicles become easier to reach with her hand. She keeps lying on her side; her legs no longer run alongside his but stay below his knees.

  1. Start in the basic position.
  2. He bends his knees and places his feet flat on the bed.
  3. He lets his knees open slightly to the sides.
  4. She stays on her side and uses her mouth and her free hand.

Variation 3: combining mouth and hand

She wraps her free hand around the base of the penis and moves it in rhythm with her mouth, which gives her more control and rests the jaw.

The bodies stay in the same place; only the use of the hands changes. The arm that rested on his abdomen slides down so her hand can hold the base of the penis. The hand follows the movement of the mouth, sets the depth and allows her to rest the mouth for a while without stopping.

  1. Start in the basic position.
  2. She slides the arm resting on his abdomen down to his pelvis.
  3. She wraps her hand around the base of the penis.
  4. She moves hand and mouth in the same rhythm, alternating when the jaw gets tired.

✓ Tips
  • Put a pillow under her head or shoulder so her neck does not have to bend.
  • She controls depth with her hand at the base of the penis; he should not push his hips up or pull her head.
  • Cover the teeth with the lips and take breaks if the jaw or neck gets tired.
  • Rest only part of the weight on his abdomen so he can breathe comfortably.
  • Oral sex can transmit STIs: a condom reduces the risk.
Interaction type
Oral sex on the penis, lying side by side
Active anatomy
Mouth and tongue; hand (optional)
Receptive anatomy
Penis
Main stimulation
Oral stimulation of the penis
Setups and participants
Couple · 2 people Hetero

Frequently asked questions

Is there penetration in this position?

No. It is an oral sex position: she stimulates his penis with her mouth while both lie on the bed.

Who controls the rhythm?

The giving partner. Her position lets her decide how fast and how deep to go, and he can relax.

How can we avoid neck strain?

Place a pillow under her head or shoulder (variation 1) and take breaks. She can also slide up or down until her neck is straight.

Is protection needed?

Oral sex can transmit some STIs, such as gonorrhoea, syphilis or herpes. A condom lowers the risk.

Safety and evidence 1 topic · 2 clinical and academic references

Scientific context for common terms used on this page. Keeping these terms makes the content easier to understand; the sources clarify what is established and what remains uncertain.

G-spot: what the evidence says

“G-spot” is a widely used term for a sensitive area of the anterior vaginal wall. Scientific literature has not established a discrete anatomical structure with an agreed location, size and nature; sensitivity and response can vary between individuals.

Sources
O'Connell HE, Sanjeevan KV, Hutson JM. Anatomy of the clitoris. The Journal of Urology. 2005. PubMed ↗
Vieira-Baptista P, et al. G-spot: Fact or Fiction? A Systematic Review. Sexual Medicine. 2021. PubMed ↗

Reviewed by the editorial team ·

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